Comics Not Just For Kids Anymore, Reports 85,000th Mainstream News Story

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Vol 48 Issue 28

Captain Actual America Overweight, Hopelessly In Debt

Comic Con is once again marred by the increasingly popular Bully-Con, a weird glitch causes 'The Amazing Spider-Man' to reboot in the middle of the movie, and the 'Richie Rich' comic strip introduces a new, even gayer character.

Bin Laden's Cook Released From Gitmo

After 10 years as a prisoner at Guantánamo Bay, 52-year-old Ibrahim al-Qosi, who served as a cook at an al-Qaeda compound in Afghanistan, was released and allowed to return to Sudan.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Pop Culture

Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

Race Relations

Comics Not Just For Kids Anymore, Reports 85,000th Mainstream News Story

NEWSSTAND—Though comics have long been considered a favorite pastime of children and teenagers, the continued popularity of comic books and movies for adults proves the genre isn't just for kids anymore, bold national news outlets reported for the 85,000th time this week. "Exchanging lighthearted fare for darker subject matter, films like The Dark Knight Rises and graphic novels by authors such as Chris Ware show that comics can have immense appeal for adults," read the groundbreaking article, making an astute and truly mind-blowing observation that had only been made 84,999 times before. "You may think adult-oriented comic books are merely the province of Archie and Jughead, but if the current trend is any indication, one thing remains clear: Comics are growing up." The incredibly perceptive and original article also specifically mentioned the work of writer Alan Moore, an obscure reference point that has only been used in every single article like this ever written.

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