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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Nation's Hardass Cops Finally Find Time To Play Games

In a sudden departure from their long-held stance of not being here to play games and not, in fact, having the time to play games, the nation’s hardass cops announced Wednesday they had finally carved out a couple hours during which games could be p...

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Comics Not Just For Kids Anymore, Reports 85,000th Mainstream News Story

NEWSSTAND—Though comics have long been considered a favorite pastime of children and teenagers, the continued popularity of comic books and movies for adults proves the genre isn't just for kids anymore, bold national news outlets reported for the 85,000th time this week. "Exchanging lighthearted fare for darker subject matter, films like The Dark Knight Rises and graphic novels by authors such as Chris Ware show that comics can have immense appeal for adults," read the groundbreaking article, making an astute and truly mind-blowing observation that had only been made 84,999 times before. "You may think adult-oriented comic books are merely the province of Archie and Jughead, but if the current trend is any indication, one thing remains clear: Comics are growing up." The incredibly perceptive and original article also specifically mentioned the work of writer Alan Moore, an obscure reference point that has only been used in every single article like this ever written.

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