Concert Ruined By Guy Enjoying Himself

Top Headlines


Roommate Skulking Around Edge Of Party Like Victorian Ghost Child

SEATTLE—Appearing initially in the far corner of the living room and then several minutes later on the threshold between the kitchen and the hallway, local roommate Kelsey Stahl was, by multiple accounts, seen skulking around the edge of a house party Friday like a Victorian ghost child.

Man Praying Interviewer Doesn’t Ask Any Questions

MINNEAPOLIS—His mouth going dry and his palms growing sweaty as he arrived at the offices of Regent Advertising Partners to interview for an open account manager position, local man Devin McKee reportedly prayed Thursday that the hiring manager wouldn’t ask him any questions during their meeting.

Man Had No Idea Cough Was Going To Be Wet One

MUSKEGON, MI—Caught completely off guard by the viscous lump of sputum that was dislodged and sent rocketing upward from his lower respiratory tract, area man Luke Reese confirmed Wednesday he had no idea his impending cough was going to be a wet one.

Area Man A Staunch Single-Gender Voter

JOHNSTOWN, PA—Saying it was the only factor he considered when deciding who to cast his ballot for, local man William Swanson, 44, told reporters Thursday he is strictly a single-gender voter.

Weird Relative At Family Reunion Knows How Everyone Related To Each Other

WELDON SPRING, MO—Saying she possessed a seemingly limitless wealth of information on various cousins, step-siblings, and in-laws, sources at the 2016 Webb family reunion this past weekend confirmed that weird relative Susan Amos, 73, exhibited a strikingly intricate knowledge of how everyone was related to each other.

Woman Worried She Doing Bad Job Enjoying Massage

MALVERN, PA—Silently wondering throughout the hour-long appointment if there was anything she could be doing to enhance the experience, local woman Caitlyn Leigh reportedly worried Wednesday that she was doing a bad job enjoying the full-body massage she was receiving.

Cyclist Clearly Loves Signaling Turns

MILWAUKEE—Judging by the firm outward thrust of the woman’s arm and the length of times she held the gestures, witnesses confirmed Wednesday that a local bicycle rider clearly loves signaling turns.

Mom On Vacation Marveling At Time Difference Compared To Home

SAN DIEGO—Having already pointed out when everyone back home was getting off work and when the local nightly news was starting, area mother Pam Westin spent much of the first day of her family’s week-long California vacation marveling at the time difference compared to where they lived, sources confirmed Tuesday.

Relaxing Tea Better Fucking Work

SMYRNA, DE—Saying he needed to be transported to a tranquil, untroubled state of calmness pronto, local man Pete McCartin, 29, told reporters Thursday that a fresh-brewed mug of purportedly relaxation-promoting tea had better fucking work.

Parents Into New Snack Now

BALLSTON, NY—Noticing they had both a Lightly Salted and a Tomato Basil version of the previously unknown product in their cupboard upon arriving for a visit home this past weekend, Jared Randall, 26, confirmed Wednesday that his parents are into a new snack now.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Concert Ruined By Guy Enjoying Himself

CHICAGO—Brian Grant, 24, reported that a rock concert he attended at the Empty Bottle Saturday was ruined by 35-year-old music fan Daryl Froemer's enthusiasm.

Froemer has a good time, to the dismay of concertgoers like Grant (inset).

"I was trying to enjoy [New York-based rock group] Oneida, but it was totally impossible because [Froemer] was making a spectacle of himself," Grant said. "I couldn't even pay attention to the band. Halfway through the set, I had to leave."

"I go out to a bar to have a good time, and I can't because there's some jackass racing around in circles and waving his beer bottle in the air," Grant added. "I mean, he was even jumping up and down during the mid-tempo songs. Come on! It's not the '90s anymore. This isn't grunge."

In addition to dancing, Froemer reportedly pounded the stage "like it was on fire," sang along when he knew the lyrics, yelled out the names of songs he wanted to hear, and repeatedly attempted to enter into a dialogue with the band.

"Every time the singer asked us a question, he was the first one to yell back," Grant said. "I don't mind the occasional 'Yeah' or 'Woo,' but this guy was shouting after every song, whistling, and asking them how their amps were. If he hadn't been so annoying, I would have been embarrassed for him."

"Did he even consider the fact that the singer might have wanted to know how the rest of us were doing?" Grant added.

Froemer's attempts to engage other bar patrons in conversation did not sit well with Grant.

"He kept turning to me to say, 'Isn't this great?'" Grant said. "How many times can you ask someone, 'Isn't this great?' and not get an answer before you realize he doesn't care to give you his opinion?"

He added: "Oh, yeah. And he kept yelling 'Rock 'n' roll!' in my face. And once he screamed 'Stooges!' I had no idea at all why he did that."

Grant said he has seen Froemer at shows before.

"I've seen him around, and he's always enthusiastic," Grant said. "But I've never seen him so wound up before."

Grant reported that he lost his patience when Froemer almost spilled a drink.

"On the way back from, like, his 20th trip to the bar, he came this close to spilling a drink all over the floor," Grant said. "If it had spilled, some of it could have gotten on me. At that point, I told my date, 'All right, enough. We're leaving.'"

This isn't the first time a concert at the Empty Bottle has been ruined by an excited fan. On Sunday, an OKGO show was wrecked by two women who spent the evening jumping up and down directly in front of the stage, blocking the view for several patrons standing behind them.

"Sometimes it's like that," said Empty Bottle manager Bruce Finkleman. "Everyone at a show is standing there, arms folded, having a great time, and then someone decides to get crazy. It can kill an otherwise perfect night. Unfortunately, unless the enthusiastic fan breaks something, my hands are tied."

Froemer, whose exuberance at most concerts is endured without incident, said he was sorry to hear that people were put off by his enjoyment of the show. Nevertheless, he said he did not plan to change his behavior at future shows.

"It's too bad someone got mad," Froemer said. "But when the band started playing 'Sheets Of Easter,' I went nuts. It's 15 minutes, two notes, and it runs over you like a monster truck. I mean, shit—that band is seriously fucking awesome!"


Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close