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Nation's Hardass Cops Finally Find Time To Play Games

In a sudden departure from their long-held stance of not being here to play games and not, in fact, having the time to play games, the nation’s hardass cops announced Wednesday they had finally carved out a couple hours during which games could be p...

Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.
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Concussed Texas Tech Receiver After Emerging From Dark Shed: 'That Was Exactly What I Needed'

LUBBOCK, TX—Adam James, whom Red Raiders head coach Mike Leach confined to a dark storage shed after suspecting the player of exaggerating or fabricating a head injury, emerged from isolation Monday saying he "felt great" and that his time in the shed was "exactly what [he] needed." "At first I thought it sounded stupid, even kind of cruel, but I have to admit it worked like a charm. My head feels awesome, 100 percent," said James, who was surprised to learn that during his recuperation Leach had been fired. "That shed is magic. Coach was right all along. He's a great guy." James' father, ESPN college football reporter Craig James, has taken time to praise Leach and his shed-confinement practice on the air and will reportedly contact university officials to advocate Leach's reinstatement.

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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

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