LONDON—After Prime Minister Theresa May initiated official proceedings for Great Britain’s exit from the European Union, sources confirmed Thursday that Queen Elizabeth II has been frantically trying to preserve the nation’s European alliances by arranging the marriages of her great-grandchildren.
NEWARK, NJ—According to colleagues of Steven Murphy, the veteran designer best contributes to the creativity, efficiency, and morale of his employer, Design-X, when he is absent. "We have our best days around here when Steven's out of the office—people collaborate without constant interruption, work flow isn't derailed so he can make his useless notations all over everything, and you can freely critique design work without worrying that someone's going to take it as a personal attack," said a coworker of Murphy's who requested anonymity. "Best of all, people go home without a splitting headache induced by a single subject: Steven Murphy, The Brilliant, Talented, And Criminally Underappreciated Designer." Coworkers declined to comment further after Murphy entered the room.