Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Crushed Philadephlia Sports Fans Devastated By Philadelphia Soul's Arena Football League Title

PHILADELPHIA—Hockey, baseball, basketball, and football fans alike are mourning the Philadelphia Soul's victory in ArenaBowl XXII, a 59-56 win over the San José SaberCats which continues the city's seemingly endless championship title drought. "It's been over 20 years since a sports team from this city won a national championship," said mayor Michael Nutter. "This arena league championship title just rubs salt in that wound." Locals are saying the damage to Philadelphia's morale and civic pride is equal to that done by Boyz II Men, the crack cocaine epidemic, and the acquisition of the Philadelphia Soul by New Jersey pop star Jon Bon Jovi.

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