Dad Suggests Arriving At Airport 14 Hours Early

Top Headlines

Recent News

Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.

Disney Unveils First Virgin Princess

LOS ANGELES—In an effort to better reflect the diverse backgrounds and experiences of their audience, Disney officials this week introduced Lily of Hazelberry, the company’s first virgin princess.
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Food

Dad Suggests Arriving At Airport 14 Hours Early

CARLISLE, MA—Planning for his family’s Saturday evening flight to Florida, local dad Walter Holbrook suggested arriving at the airport at least 14 hours early, sources confirmed. "The plane leaves at 6:45 at night, and it takes a little while to park the car and get through security, so we should plan to get there no later than 4:45 a.m.," said Holbrook, adding that it would probably be smart to add an extra "eight to nine hours" to the car commute in case of traffic. "That should give us more than enough time to print our boarding passes, check in luggage, and get settled at the gate. Then we’ll have 10 hours to get food if anyone’s hungry.” At press time, Holbrook had reportedly revised the arrival time to 3:45 a.m. "just to be safe."

Next Story