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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Daryl Johnston Admits He Doesn’t Feel Comfortable Being Alone In Booth With Kenny Albert

DALLAS—Describing him as both “creepy” and “kind of a weirdo,” Fox NFL color commentator Daryl Johnston admitted Wednesday that he does not feel comfortable being alone in the broadcast booth with play-by-play partner Kenny Albert. “Whenever there’s a pause in the action, all I’m thinking about is how badly I want to get the hell out of there,” said Johnston, adding that he was disconcerted by Albert slowly rocking back and forth while licking his lips and emitting small giggles at seemingly random intervals during every commercial break.“There’s something off about him. Occasionally, without warning, he’ll move over close enough so that our thighs are just touching, and then he’ll stare straight ahead with this big dumb grin on his face. It’s really unsettling.” Johnston added that he is equally disturbed by Albert’s unwavering insistence that they book adjoining hotel rooms.

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