Dead Grandfather Still Talking About Ebbets Field

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Vol 49 Issue 43

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Dead Grandfather Still Talking About Ebbets Field

FLUSHING, NY—A full eight years following his fatal heart attack, deceased grandfather Martin Whitley continues to talk about Ebbets Field and his experiences at the demolished New York ballpark, individuals close to the dead man confirmed Tuesday. “Every time we go to Grandpa’s grave to pay our respects, you can still hear him down there going on and on about his memories of taking the subway down to Prospect Park to see the Brooklyn Dodgers, and how there’ll never be another stadium like that ever again,” said Whitley’s grandson David, telling reporters that despite having been dead and buried for nearly a decade, his grandfather continues to reminisce fondly about Jackie Robinson, the Dodgers’ 1955 World Series win, and “good ol’ [former play-by-play announcer] Red [Barber].” “Anyone who gets within 30 feet of his burial plot can hear his muffled voice complaining about how it absolutely broke his heart when they tore down that beautiful ballpark to put up a bunch of lousy apartment buildings.” At press time, the dead man was informing reporters that “they just don’t make ’em like Leo Durocher anymore.”

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