Defense Department Typo Results In U.S. Attack On Ira

In This Section

Vol 47 Issue 52

Where Did U.S. Money Go In Iraq?

According to a report in The Washington Post, Gen. David Petraeus and other American military commanders were given access to $5 billion in discretionary funds to spend on various projects like a now-defunct $1 million water park in Baghdad. Here are some of the places the money went to:

U.S. Ends Combat Operations In Iraq

Last week, the U.S. occupation of Iraq officially ceased being a combat mission as the military entered the stability phase of its operations. Here are some of the major victories of the seven-and-a-half-year war.

Obama Declares Victory, Sort Of, Depending On How You Look At It, In Iraq

CAMP SPRINGS, MD—"For nearly a decade, our mission in Iraq has been to root out those who would choose violence over peace, to create a stable Iraqi government, and to transfer power to an incorruptable civilian police force," Obama said. "And, in a manner of speaking, we sort of did some of that, right? More or less?"

Iraq's Little Victories

After a busy election season, it's easy to forget that while the two candidates were fighting over the presidency, we were still fighting a war in...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Entertainment

Originality

  • Restaurant Gives Totally Unwanted Twist To Mexican Cuisine

    BERKELEY, CA—Claiming that the eatery was already generating a buzz among locals with its “East Meets Mex” flavors, owners of the Bento Burrito location on Shattuck Avenue explained to reporters Tuesday how their new restaurant offers a ...

Defense Department Typo Results In U.S. Attack On Ira

ARLINGTON, VA—The U.S. Defense Department apologized to Skokie, IL, dentist Ira Nussbaum Tuesday following a bombing campaign aimed at removing the 37-year-old from power. "Apparently, the intelligence source who drafted the attack plan against Iraq failed to strike the 'Q' key hard enough," Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said. "The 'Q' was always a little stubborn on that keyboard. Sorry." This marks the first military action taken against Nussbaum since a malfunctioning shift key prompted Ulster Unionists to detonate his Ford Taurus in 1998.

Jump to next story

Onion Video

Watch More