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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Dikembe Mutombo Donates $15 Million Sports Arena To Congo

KINSHASA, DEM. REP. OF CONGO—Houston Rockets center Dikembe Mutombo fulfilled a lifelong dream Monday, announcing that he will donate a much-needed $15 million sports arena named after his deceased mother to his native Congo. "Now the poor, impoverished people of my homeland will be able to take solace in the Biamba Marie Mutombo Sporting & Convention Center, an arena which my mother always dreamed of," said Mutombo, who noted that the arena could expand to 72,500 seats for concerts and ice shows. "The BMM Center will ensure that the people of the Congo will have a chance to watch healthy competition." Tickets for the first and only sporting event scheduled for the new arena—a one-on-one basketball game between Mutombo and Hakeem Olajuwon—are on sale through Ticketmaster starting at $80 apiece.

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