DNC Coverage: Cover Up

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City Adds Some Big Concrete Stairs

They’re For Sitting On Or Running Up Or Something

CHICAGO—Noting the structure’s considerable size and prominent location in a busy public park, local residents confirmed Tuesday that the city had installed some big concrete stairs that were probably for sitting on or running up or something like that.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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This Great Song, Bar Sources Report

TOMAH, WI—Pausing their conversations momentarily to call attention to the music playing on the establishment’s jukebox, sources at local bar Shepherd’s confirmed to reporters Friday that this is a great song.


College Freshman Decides To Be Lanyard-Wearing Kind

ANN ARBOR, MI—Emphasizing that this was not a choice he had made lightly, University of Michigan student Kevin Peterson told reporters Thursday that he had officially decided to become one of the lanyard-wearing kind of freshmen.

DNC Coverage: Cover Up

You get a lot of griping from journalists who say "Nothing Happens" at these political conventions. There is a lot going on - but you just have to look for it.

Last night I spent some time at the Con snooping around the beautiful Pepsi Cola Center. I started to get "the Hungries" and was pleased as punch when I saw the friendly logo of the Arby's Roast Beef Restaurant. But when I approached, I found that it had been shut down.

Why? Why do the Democrats HATE Arby's Roast Beef Restaurant?? Right there is a story waiting to be told. I may not have time to track down the answer on this but perhaps someone out there reading in the "Information Superhighway" can do some "Blogg" work and get to the bottom of it. This could be a moment for the "New Media" that people keep talking about to really shine.

One thing's for sure: something's rotten in Denver. I know the Democrats hate business, but my instincts tell me it's something more than that. Could it be that the secret skeleton in Barracks Obama's closet is that he is really a meat-hating vegetarian??

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