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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Doctor, Patient Have Wildly Different Definitions Of Word 'Hope'

WESTBROOK, ME— Terminally ill patient Wayne Lund and his physician have wildly differing definitions of the word "hope," it was revealed Monday. "Dr. [Robert] Petrakis said there's hope," said Lund, recently diagnosed with Wyckoff-Kleiner Disease, a rare degenerative brain condition that is 99.5 percent fatal. "If that's the case, I'm gonna beat this thing." Said Petrakis: "I told him, 'There's always hope... miracles do happen.' So, technically, I guess there's hope. But not really."

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New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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