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Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?
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Doctors Clear RGIII’s Knee For Light Tearing

RICHMOND, VA—Calling it an encouraging sign for the 23-year-old, Redskins team doctors have reportedly cleared quarterback Robert Griffin III’s knee to resume light tearing this week, team sources confirmed Wednesday. “Robert’s knee has healed to the point where we feel he can safely start damaging the ligament again,” said orthopedist James Andrews, noting that Griffin should limit himself to simple overstretching at first before gradually easing into more challenging connective tissue ripping. “Heading into August, we plan on having Robert tear his knee more severely each day so that the tendon can be 100 percent shredded by the time the season begins.” Andrews added that if all goes according to plan, Griffin would be ready for a season-ending injury by as early as week one or two.

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