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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Carson Wentz

After being selected second overall in the 2016 NFL Draft, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Carson Wentz opened the season with a nearly flawless performance in a victory over the Cleveland Browns. Is he any good?
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Doctors Optimistic Sam Bradford 2 Months Away From Beginning Work On Broadcasting Career

ST. LOUIS—Stressing that the 26-year-old is remaining positive during his initial recovery from a second season-ending knee injury, team doctors expressed their optimism Friday that St. Louis Rams quarterback Sam Bradford is just two months from starting work on a promising sports broadcasting career. “Given his MRI scans and the general timetable for any ACL reconstruction, Sam will need roughly 60 days before he can start laying the foundations for delivering concise and articulate color commentary during a live football broadcast,” said team orthopedic surgeon Dr. Matthew Matava, noting that based on the extent of the ligament damage, the former Heisman Trophy winner should be able to begin practicing on-camera play-by-play analysis in six to eight weeks. “A conservative estimate would have him working with a voice coach and reading text from a teleprompter within three months, but barring any major setbacks, he could begin that process as early as mid-October. Sam has shown a great commitment to his rehab, and he is already well on his way to comfortably exchanging banter on the set of a postgame show by the start of next season.” Matava went on to tell reporters he is “incredibly confident” that Bradford will go on to have a long and productive career on ESPN’s College GameDay.

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