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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Drunk Driver In The Zone

STOUGHTON, WI—Alcoholic and car owner Jim Torkleson attributes his "best-ever" 11-mile, 0.14 blood-alcohol-content drunken drive home from Abley's Bar Friday to being totally "in the zone." "It was like everything was happening in slow motion, even though I must have been doing well over a hundred," said Torkleson, who claimed that he has been driving drunk for more than 10 years, but only recently "really hit [his] stride." "Some kind of sixth sense let me just slip past other cars, over raccoons, between kids on bikes, you name it. It was like the road and everyone on it just went away." Torkleson said the cruise afforded him the greatest high while driving since the time a police officer forgot to put his cruiser in park after pulling Torkleson over.

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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