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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Carson Wentz

After being selected second overall in the 2016 NFL Draft, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Carson Wentz opened the season with a nearly flawless performance in a victory over the Cleveland Browns. Is he any good?
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Eagles Fans Fully Expect Donovan McNabb To Play With Torn ACL

PHILADELPHIA—Although All-Pro quarterback Donovan McNabb was sidelined last week with a torn anterior cruciate ligament that doctors expect will keep him from playing for eight to 12 months, the majority of Eagles fans fully expect McNabb to suit up for Philadelphia's game this Sunday against the Indianapolis Colts. "This is an important game for the Eagles and for the city of Philadelphia, and a chance for Donovan to finally prove himself and get the Eagles back on the path to the Super Bowl," said 42-year-old Philadelphia resident Harold Guthrey, who dismissed reports that the swelling in torn and ruptured tissues around McNabb's knee was so severe that surgery would have to wait at least four weeks. "The people of this great city have put their trust in Donovan McNabb, and he should know that Philadelphia fans expect their Eagles to play tough." According to Dr. Frank Fitzgerald, an orthopedic surgeon specializing in catastrophic knee injuries and lifelong Eagles fan, McNabb should seek him out for a second opinion.

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