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The Pros And Cons Of Gene Editing

Recent advancements in gene editing have introduced a number of exciting possibilities for human advancement and raised difficult ethical questions. The Onion breaks down the pros and cons of gene editing.

Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
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Eco-Conscious Marketing Firm Developing Alternative Sources Of Synergy

PORTLAND, OR—Marketing firm Green Solutions announced Wednesday that it was developing environmentally friendly alternatives to the nonrenewable sources of synergy, global positioning, and blue-sky thinking currently used to fuel the nation's corporations. "We take an eco-friendly approach to packaging and presenting what our clients have to offer," said Anthony Marino, the firm's founder and CEO. "With green, clean, responsible solutions, we believe businesses can sustain brand awareness while also treading gently upon the world's markets." Marino confirmed that while his firm's innovations had not yet been widely implemented, they were currently being tested in areas considered dangerously low in buzz.

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