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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Excited Mike Krzyzewski: Duke Squad Hasn't Been This Unlikable In Years

DURHAM, NC—Though cautioning that it is still early in the season, a beaming Mike Krzyzewski told reporters Monday he has not seen a Duke team this unlikable in many years, and is optimistic about the Blue Devils' chances to grow even more repulsive and annoying with practice. "Obviously, we set the pace early with my all-time wins record and the never-ending, fawning media hoopla over that, and I think we've been able to stay consistently repellent since then," said Coach Krzyzewski, who argued that his current players' obnoxious ability to draw charges compares with his most loathsome teams ever, giving them the potential to become more infuriating than any J.J. Redick­–led squad. "We've got Stephen Curry's little brother, a ball-hogging NBA coach's son, three Plumlees, and a whole roster of overprivileged assholes, so all the pieces are in place for this to be one of the prickiest teams in Blue Devils history. We just need to get it done." Krzyzewski said he does not want to weigh the team down with expectations, but college basketball fans should not be surprised to find themselves cursing and turning off their televisions in utter disgust come March.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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