Falcons Starting To See Why No One Believed In Them

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Vol 49 Issue 04

North Korea To Test New Nuclear Weapon

In response to recently imposed U.N. sanctions, North Korea vowed to conduct its third test of a nuclear weapon, warning of confrontation with its proclaimed “arch-enemy” the United States.

Study Exposes Risks Of Conducting Research While Driving

NASA continues its search for a planet capable of supporting NASA, Prince Harry announces that he killed some Taliban-looking people during his tour of duty, and a copy of 'The Scarlet Letter'' can't believe the notes a high schooler is writing in its mar...
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Falcons Starting To See Why No One Believed In Them

ATLANTA—Following their disappointing 28-24 defeat to the 49ers in the NFC Championship Game, members of the Atlanta Falcons confirmed Tuesday that the team is beginning to understand why nobody in the country believed in them this season. “At first I thought everyone was just bitter about our number one seed, but after blowing a 17-point lead at home to lose the game, now I see why people never stopped doubting us,” said Falcons wide receiver Roddy White, adding that with a 1-4 record in the playoffs since 2008, “it totally makes sense” not to take the team seriously as a postseason threat. “I guess when you think about it, we’re basically just an above-average team that always falls apart during the playoffs, so it’s no wonder everyone kept saying we wouldn’t even reach the Super Bowl, let alone win it. And they were right.” White also confirmed that after a second-half interception and a costly fumbled snap, the entire Falcons organization now realizes why the entire country has always insisted that Matt Ryan is not an elite quarterback.

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