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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Fan At Indians Game Upset To Find Someone Else In His Section

CLEVELAND—Having made his way up the series of ramps to Progressive Field’s upper deck, 32-year-old Cleveland Indians fan Bradley Hunt’s excitement for the upcoming game against the Texas Rangers quickly shifted to frustration after finding another person sitting in his section, sources confirmed Friday. “Oh, come on, what is this guy doing here?” Hunt said in reference to the lone man in the sea of empty rows overlooking right field, noting that there were plenty of other unoccupied upper deck sections nearby where one could sit and watch the game alone from an equally good vantage point. “It’s so annoying to climb all the way up here expecting to grab my section, only to find some random guy took it. I mean, I paid $14 for this. It’s ridiculous.” At press time, having failed to sort the situation out diplomatically, an irate Hunt was searching for the stadium’s lone usher to escort the man out.

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