adBlockCheck

Fandom

U.S. Still Enjoying Small But Loyal Following

WASHINGTON—While the nation’s mainstream popularity has largely diminished in recent years, sources confirmed this week that the United States still retains a passionate fan base composed of a few extremely dedicated followers.

Sports Fan Has Opinion

INDIANAPOLIS—A local sports fan has an opinion about sports, sources confirmed Wednesday. According to individuals close to the situation, area man Justin Donnelly, a self-described sports “diehard,” is currently airing his thoughts on a...

Keira Knightley Answers Fan Letter Way Too Quickly

FORT WAYNE, IN—According to local computer programmer and Keira Knightley fan Tom Hayes, 38, the internationally known English film actress and model responded "much too fast" to the letter he sent just a few days ago.
End Of Section
  • More News

Fandom

Fanatically Devoted Nerd Could Potentially Turn On Simon Pegg At Any Moment

DURHAM, NC—Despite being a long-avowed fan of the British comedian, actor, and director, local nerd Josh Russell is liable to turn against Simon Pegg without any warning whatsoever, sources confirmed Tuesday. “Right now he loves Pegg’s stuff, but knowing Josh, 45 seconds from now he could be talking about how, in hindsight, Shaun Of The Dead and Hot Fuzz weren’t all that great,” said Russell’s friend Chandra Hughes, noting how the 37-year-old is capable of sudden, unprompted reversals of opinion on nearly any topic. “In the blink of an eye he might very well start calling them ‘cheap, hack-job slapstick’ and asking if we’re ‘really still watching Simon Pegg in 2013.’ It will be like his Joss Whedon reversal all over again.” At press time, sources indicated that Russell had just finished watching The World’s End and was letting out an equivocal sigh, seemingly gathering his thoughts, and preparing to speak.

Fandom

More from this section

Sports Fan Has Opinion

INDIANAPOLIS—A local sports fan has an opinion about sports, sources confirmed Wednesday. According to individuals close to the situation, area man Justin Donnelly, a self-described sports “diehard,” is currently airing his thoughts on a...

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close