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Fathers

Dad Way Scarier When Controlling Temper

SANTA ROSA, CA—Noting the 51-year-old’s increasingly flushed complexion, wide and intense eyes, and slow, heavy breathing during an argument Friday morning, local siblings Jeff and Katie Russell told reporters that their father, Dave Russell, ...

Area Family Has No Idea Where Dad Gets Shirts

SHERIDAN, WY—Saying he must get them somehow but that his means of procurement remained a mystery, the children of area father Don Griffith, 42, confirmed Friday they have no idea where he gets his shirts.

Area Dad Off To Bad Start With Waitress

BETHEL, PA—Following an awkward exchange in which Tom Richardson flagged down their server for "a round of waters" mere seconds after being seated, family members confirmed Sunday the 56-year-old father of three was off to a rough start wi...
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Fathers

Father Apologizes For Taking Out Anger On Wrong Son

ELIZABETH, NJ—Moments after losing his composure with an unwarranted emotional outburst, local father David Kessler reportedly apologized to his son Christopher Thursday for erroneously taking out his anger on him and not his older brother Peter. “I’m really sorry I snapped at you earlier, Chris—you aren’t the one who deserves it,” said Kessler, admitting he overreacted by losing his temper and berating the 16-year-old instead of his lazy and useless elder sibling. “I was totally out of line when I was screaming at someone other than Peter. There’s really no excuse for me to treat anyone except for your good-for-nothing brother that way. I promise it will never happen again.” Following the apology to his youngest son, sources confirmed that a sentimental Kessler told his assembled family members he was very proud of all but one of them.


It may be hard being a perfect dad, but it’s a piece of cake to tune into The Jim Gaffigan Show, premiering July 15 on TV Land.

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