adBlockCheck

Favre: I've Always Had A Passion For Stopping Things, Then Starting To Do Things Again

Top Headlines

Sports

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Favre: I've Always Had A Passion For Stopping Things, Then Starting To Do Things Again

KILN, MS—Embattled quarterback Brett Favre attempted Monday to explain his recent actions concerning his recent reversal of his decision to retire by holding a press conference in which he explained his lifelong love for quitting things briefly before resuming those same things after a certain interval of time had passed. "I'm just that kind of guy, I guess—a gunslinger on one hand, but on the other, a man who knows when to stop, at least at first, but then it turns out I really didn't know when to stop after all," Favre said. "I guess you could say I'm a guy who quits, then realizes I don't know the meaning of the word quit." A number of the journalists present were later heard to wonder, in light of Favre's recent inexplicable behavior, if perhaps drinking heavily were one of the things the first-ballot Hall of Famer had stopped doing before starting again.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close