FBI Tracks Down Elusive Picture-Disc Version Of Herb Alpert’s ‘Whipped Cream And Other Delights’

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Vol 49 Issue 10

Iowa Fashion Week Begins

DES MOINES, IA—The greater Des Moines area was abuzz with excitement Monday as Iowa’s annual Fashion Week officially kicked off, opening a busy seven days of runway shows and clothing exhibitions showcasing Iowa’s hottest new styles from...

Albany Bucket Museum

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THE HEAVENS—Saying that maybe He wasn’t around enough and could have expressed His divine love a little better throughout the history of mankind, Our Lord God and Almighty Father expressed concern Thursday that He might have fucked up His chil...

Justin Bieber Hospitalized After Fainting At Concert

Teen pop sensation Justin Bieber was seen struggling during a performance of “Beauty and a Beat” at a show in London last night before walking off stage and fainting out of view of the audience, and was later taken to a hospital.
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FBI Tracks Down Elusive Picture-Disc Version Of Herb Alpert’s ‘Whipped Cream And Other Delights’

WASHINGTON—Following a three-month search involving more than 1,000 officers, FBI Director Robert S. Mueller III announced Tuesday that his agency has located an elusive picture-disc pressing of the 1965 hit album Whipped Cream & Other Delights by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass. “After canvassing hundreds of crates in Salvation Army locations across the country, as well as the pursuit of innumerable dead-end eBay leads, we can now confirm that this classic instrumental-pop record from the golden age of A&M is finally in FBI custody,” Mueller said while showing reporters the iconic image of a young woman covered in whipped cream on the color-vinyl album, which the bureau purchased from an online vintage LP forum user for $18.90 and a trade of four Stiff Little Fingers 7-inches. “It’s a little scratched up, but it’s still in good enough condition that it will continue to appreciate in value.” Mueller concluded by stating that an APB was still out for the 1984 Poland-shaped single “Warsaw In The Sun” by Krautrock pioneers Tangerine Dream, and that anyone with information regarding its whereabouts should send an e-mail to fedvinylfreak@fbi.gov.

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