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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Former Nun Responds To Release Of Pau Gasol Sex Tape

The Lakers are dealing with another distraction as they make their playoff push: the leak of a surreal, expressionistic sex tape starring power forward Pau Gasol. The woman who filmed and appears in the tape, an ex-nun known only as "H," agreed to write about her experience filming with Gasol:

I am disturbed by the release of the tape, but only the timing and the nature of the release. "Physiology Of Desire" was conceived not as a "sex tape" in the traditional sense, but as a radical deconstruction of western notions of sexuality, eroticism, sense, capitalism and longing. Though filmed months ago, the project was not complete, and it was our intention for the film to be screened only once against the wall of an abandoned train station. For the film to be distributed on television and over the internet cheapens its effect and dulls the alienating blow it was meant to deliver.

Since its release, most have read the film as a piece of erotica through the lens of the male gaze. This interpretation is incorrect. "Physiology Of Desire" was intended as a critique of imperialistic sensuality -- those who see it as less than this miss the irony. I am amused by the public's reaction of disdain and mock horror -- it only proves the ideas upon which the film was based. I know Pau is more idealistic in his art; he would have liked for the film to change people's minds.

As for Pau himself, he was inspired, generous and professional, and I know I could never work with him again. I wish him luck in his next project, and hope he finds satisfaction in himself, as those who create to please any other than themselves are inevitably disappointed.

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