Freezing, Coatless Woman Has Decided It Is Spring

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Determined Restaurant Patrons Tough It Out On Chilly Patio

CHICAGO—Steeling themselves against the occasional breeze and the cold of the wrought iron table and chairs against their skin, a group of determined restaurant-goers reportedly braved the slightly chilly temperature Thursday and dined on the outdoo...

Getting Through Allergy Season

While for most people, spring means life and rebirth, for allergy sufferers, the excess of pollen in the air means watery eyes and runny noses.
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Freezing, Coatless Woman Has Decided It Is Spring

CHICAGO—Wearing a cardigan and a thin scarf, freezing woman Melissa Cady, 34, reportedly walked to work in frigid temperatures today following her decision that it is spring now. “The date is April 8 and it is now springtime and it is beautiful out,” said the shivering, coatless woman as a gust of cold air blasted into her face. “Winter is over. The seasons have changed. I am happy and warm now.” Sources said the woman spent her lunch hour walking along Lake Michigan, vigorously rubbing her hands together and blowing into them.

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