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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Freshman Running Back Wondering If Other Four Freshmen Running Backs Were Told They'd Start This Year

LOS ANGELES—University of Southern California freshman running back C.J. Gable wondered at practice yesterday if head coach Pete Carroll had also told fellow freshmen running backs Kenny Ashley, Stanley Havili, Stafon Johnson, and Emmanuel Moody that they would be given the opportunity to start this year. "When I was recruited, Coach Carroll told me I was the next Reggie Bush and the team's future," a homesick and confused Gable said to his mother during a phone call. "I wonder, is that something he tells all the other freshman running backs to get them to come to USC?" Gable later assumed his worst fears were coming true when Carroll remarked that all the freshmen running backs, along with six other upperclassmen running backs, were "really cluttering up the Trojan locker room."

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