'Fuck You,' Obama Says In Hilarious Correspondents' Dinner Speech

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Vol 49 Issue 18

Tuesday, May 14

Author and ecologist Michael Strandley will be at the Cameron Library on Tuesday discussing his lifelong work with bears and why he thinks they’re overrated.

No One In Limo Going To Prom With The One They Wanted

INDEPENDENCE, MO—None of the six students in the white stretch limousine presently en route to Harry Truman High School’s senior prom are attending the event with the person they wanted to be their date, sources reported this evening.
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'Fuck You,' Obama Says In Hilarious Correspondents' Dinner Speech

'No, Really, Fuck Every One Of You'

WASHINGTON—President Obama left attendees of the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner in stitches Saturday night after delivering a hilarious speech repeatedly telling the entire room to “fuck off.” “No, seriously, each and every one of you cocksuckers can go fuck yourselves; I fucking hate all of you,” Obama said to the uproarious laughter and applause of the assembled politicians and media personalities. “Stop laughing. I’m not fucking kidding, idiots. All of you gathered here today are a bunch of spineless, hypocritical pieces of shit, and I have absolutely zero respect for anyone in this room. So, fuck you all, and may you and your families go straight to fucking hell.” Critics have praised Obama’s performance at the annual dinner, saying the president’s jokes were sharp and his timing has “never been better.”

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