adBlockCheck

Gary Kubiak Congratulates Houston Texans On Yet Another Houston Texans Season

Top Headlines

Sports

How The IOC Plans To Address Doping

In light of its recent decision not to bar Russian athletes from competing in Rio despite their use of performance-enhancing drugs, the International Olympic Committee is working to establish more effective protocols to keep the Games drug-free. Here are some ways the IOC plans to address doping:
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Gary Kubiak Congratulates Houston Texans On Yet Another Houston Texans Season

HOUSTON—Following his team’s loss to the New England Patriots last weekend, Houston Texans coach Gary Kubiak reportedly gathered players and staff to congratulate them on engineering yet another Houston Texans season. “I know some of you are still disappointed, but no matter what, we can hold our heads high for putting together back-to-back Texans seasons,” said Kubiak, adding that after winning 11 of their first 13 games, the team’s ability to succumb to crucial injuries, totally lose momentum, and eventually bow out of the playoffs in the divisional round made it “one of the most Houston Texans seasons in franchise history.” “Things didn’t always go our way, and plenty of people doubted us, but we came together when it counted and finished with a classic Houston Texans run down the stretch. And I’m proud of each and every one of you for that.” According to team sources, Kubiak singled out quarterback Matt Schaub in particular for having the most Matt Schaub season of the nine-year veteran’s career.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close