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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Gay Teen Still Going To Buy LeBron James Jersey

LAWRENCEVILLE, NJ—After learning NBA center Jason Collins became the first active player from a major American team sport to come out as a homosexual, gay 15-year-old Kyle Morgan confirmed Monday that he still plans to buy a LeBron James Miami Heat jersey. “That’s great for Collins and all that, but have you seen LeBron this season? The guy is amazing,” said the gay teenager, noting that James will “go down as the greatest NBA player of all time when all is said and done.” “He can shoot, he can pass, he can defend every position—he can do everything. And he’s absolutely unstoppable when he’s driving to the rim. As soon as I have enough money, I’m definitely getting a Heat away jersey with ‘James’ on the back.” While Morgan confirmed that he proudly supports Collins’ decision to come out, the gay teen told reporters that James is “far and away [his] biggest role model.”

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