adBlockCheck

Politics

Bill O’Reilly Tearfully Packs Up Framed Up-Skirt Photos From Desk

NEW YORK—Smiling wistfully as he gazed at the cherished mementos that had sat on his desk for much of the past 20 years, former Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly reportedly grew teary-eyed Thursday as he packed up the framed up-skirt photos from his work space following his termination by the cable channel.

Donald Trump Jr. Takes Son On Hunting Trip In National Zoo

WASHINGTON—In what he referred to as an important rite of passage for his 8-year-old son, Donald John III, Donald Trump Jr. took his eldest boy to the Smithsonian National Zoological Park for his first-ever hunting trip, sources said Wednesday.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
End Of Section
  • More News

Gay War Hero Awarded Posthumous Dishonorable Discharge At White House Ceremony

WASHINGTON—In a solemn ceremony held in the White House Rose Garden Monday, recently outed Iraq War casualty Sgt. Maj. Michael Delacroix—a highly decorated career serviceman with an impeccable 22-year record—was posthumously stripped of his military honors and dishonorably discharged from the U.S. Army. "For giving his life in the line of duty and selflessly serving his nation while being gay, Mr. Delacroix will be exhumed from Arlington National Cemetery and relieved of his rank and all attendant benefits," U.S. Secretary of Defense Robert Gates said during the ceremony. "We also ask that his mother return the American flag that was given to her at his funeral." A Pentagon spokesman said that Delacroix's cause of death—sniper fire while attempting to save an injured Iraqi boy—will be changed to AIDS in the official record.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close