Genuine Love And Respect Only Thing Holding Area Relationship Together

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Vol 47 Issue 20

Man's Life Riddled With Continuity Errors

DENTON, TX—Sources confirmed Friday that the life of local marketing associate Rich Hammond has been plagued by a series of glaring errors in continuity, leading many to believe it was poorly thought out, with little regard for basic logic or consis...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

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Genuine Love And Respect Only Thing Holding Area Relationship Together

CROWLEY, LA—According to friends of Brian and Stacey Stockton, the couple's 30-year marriage is currently hanging by a thread, with only their profound love and mutual respect for one another keeping them together. "If they don't get a divorce soon, I'd be surprised, because at this point all they've really got to go on is their deep, abiding trust, strong sense of commitment, and willingness to compromise," neighbor Vince Cafferty told reporters Sunday, adding that the only thing preventing the couple from separating is the fact that they've acted as beacons of support and affection for each other from the moment they first met. "Marriages like that—built on empathy, a rock-solid belief system, and undying devotion—simply can't last. There's just nothing there." Cafferty added that he thinks the Stocktons are only staying together for their kids, who went away to college years ago, have recently gotten married, and now use their parents' relationship as a model for their own.

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