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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Ghostwriter Taking A Few Creative Liberties With Paul Reiser's Life

LOS ANGELES—Challenged with the task of filling in details about Paul Reiser's life since the actor–comedian's work on the series Mad About You, ghostwriter Patrick Zyglund resorted to outright fabrication Tuesday. "I think I can spike things up a bit with a couple dozen pages in which Paul insinuates that he's drying out in a private recovery spa in Baja California and has to turn down roles in Unforgiven and Short Cuts, then sex it up with an extramarital love interest, let's say with a British supermodel," Zyglund said. "That'll give me the chance to gloss over The Marrying Man." Reiser himself was not available for comment on the autobiography, tentatively titled Reiserhood and scheduled for a May 2007 release, since his agent has not yet informed him it is being written.

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