TOLLAND, CT—Responding with lightning-quick reflexes to her dinner guest’s proposal, area mother Linda McGregor reportedly grabbed a 10-inch chef’s knife Thursday night and held it up to the throat of family friend Diane Wallace following her offer to help with the dishes.
INNISKILL, RISonny Jim, a 9-month-old goldfish, can no longer tolerate his bowlmate, 9-month-old goldfish Sally. "Always hanging out at the top of the bowl, looking for food, just waiting, blocking the light," Sonny Jim said Monday. "Never moves. Just eats and craps and does that annoying thing with his mouth. Unless I want to go in the castle. Then, bam! Sally's right there hogging the whole thing. Also, 'Sally?' A guy. What's with that?" The beleaguered miniature carp said he would prefer rooming with a "psychotic betta fish" and wouldn't care if Sally jumped out of the bowl.