adBlockCheck

Recent News

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
End Of Section
  • More News

Gray Wolves Sighted In Capitol Building For First Time In 85 Years

Species Making Comeback In Senate Chambers, Excited Wildlife Experts Say

WASHINGTON—Wildlife biologists confirmed Friday they have documented multiple sightings of endangered gray wolves in the U.S. Capitol building, marking the first time in almost a century these elusive creatures have been observed in either house of Congress. "This is an enormous step toward restoring the species to the nation's seat of legislative power, where gray wolf populations once thrived," said zoologist Ben Garret, explaining that motion-activated C-SPAN cameras had caught an entire pack passing right through the central rotunda area, and showed one of the males briefly sniffing Sen. Joseph Lieberman's shoe before rejoining the group. "Gray wolves once sat atop a complex ecological food chain in the Capitol, roaming freely through its halls, and without them, the Senate and House membership has run rampant." Senior lawmakers have called for a swift eradication of the wolves, which they blame for startling Congress's blue-ribbon heifer, Tabitha, and causing her milk to run sour.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close