Guy At Bar Had Similar Experience, But Better

In This Section

Vol 43 Issue 39

Utah Polygamist Convicted

Warren Jeffs, the leader of a polygamous Mormon splinter group, was found guilty of being an accomplice to rape for marrying a 14-year-old girl to a...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Small Business

Guy At Bar Had Similar Experience, But Better

KENT, OH—A story narrated to a group of friends Friday night was almost immediately overshadowed by an anecdote from 28-year-old John Kiley, who informed everyone present that when he experienced almost exactly the same situation, the circumstances  were far more interesting.

"It's funny you mention that, because I saw that band, too, but it was last year, when they were at the peak of their ability and still had their original bassist," Kiley said. "They did a double encore that night. Pretty rare for them."

Kiley later added that he had that one baseball card, too, but he got it in a pack he bought at the store, which allowed him to make a much larger profit when he later sold it.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More