Guy Typing In All Caps Supports Edward Snowden

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Vol 49 Issue 24

More White Americans Dying Than Being Born

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, for the first time in modern history, more white Americans are dying than being born, with whites predicted to fall below 50 percent of the population by 2043.

NSA: Surveillance Thwarted ‘Dozens’ Of Terrorist Acts

The NSA chief claimed that his agency’s phone and internet surveillance programs had stopped “dozens” of acts of terrorism, and the FBI director added that, had the programs been in place at the time, the government could have also preve...
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Guy Typing In All Caps Supports Edward Snowden

OMAHA, NE—Calling Edward Snowden both a “TRUE PATRIOT” and an “AMERICAN HERO,” Tony Dewitt, 32, reportedly voiced his unflinching support for the NSA whistleblower Tuesday by using only capital letters in the comment section of a WashingtonPost.com article. “EDWARD SNOWDEN IS THE ONLY ONE WILLING TO UNCOVER THE LIES WE ARE ALL BEING TOLD,” wrote Dewitt, who was furiously banging on his keyboard for several minutes and had misspelled the word “surveillance” 14 times. “JUST LIKE THE FOUNDING FATHERS HE DIDN”T WAIT FOR ANY ONE ELSE#$ TO ACT AND PROTECTED AMERICANS!!!111 NOW THEY WANT TO PUT HIM BEHIND BARS FOR GOOD.” At press time, Dewitt was intensely breathing in and out after reaching the comment box’s 2,000-character limit.

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