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Sports

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?
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Halftime Show At Bruins-Devils Hockey Game Disrupted By Second Period Of Play

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—A combination marching band and pompom squad show planned for the halfway point of Tuesday night's Boston-New Jersey hockey game was disrupted by the continuation of on-ice play during the second of the game's three periods, Devils team officials announced Thursday morning. "I take full responsibility for the injuries to Bruins center Sergei Samsonov, Devils defenseman Brian Rafalski, and the trombone section of the Verona Marching Hillbillies, all but two of whom I'm told are out of the hospital," Devils Events And Entertainment Coordinator Janine Petersen said during a press conference at which she also tendered her resignation. "In seeking to provide a comprehensive sports-entertainment package for the whole family regardless of hockey knowledge, I failed to keep in mind the three-period structure of the game." Petersen, who has not yet been charged with any crimes, was hired on a trial basis by the Devils in September despite her involvement in the tragic halftime show at this year's Daytona 500.

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