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Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Benny The Bull Busted For Possession Of Unlicensed T-Shirt Gun

CHICAGO—Noting that the suspect had been taken into custody after officers managed to tackle and wrestle the individual to the ground of the United Center concourse, police confirmed Monday that Chicago Bulls mascot Benny the Bull was arrested for possession of an unlicensed T-shirt gun.

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.
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Hannah Storm On What She’s Learned From Interviewing NFL Players: ‘They’re Idiots’

BRISTOL, CT—Claiming that the interviews during the NFL Face To Face series were very enlightening, SportsCenter anchor Hannah Storm revealed Monday that the in-depth conversations with NFL superstars taught her that professional football players are complete idiots. “When you sit down and really talk to a NFL player, you see right away that they are just dumb as fuck,” said Storm, adding that the dipshits elaborated on their goals, feelings, and passions with a series of incoherent and incredibly moronic statements. “As individuals, each of them shared their amazingly stupid thoughts on a number of topics, which provided a unique insight into an uneducated jerk.” Storm told reporters that despite their talent and physical prowess, NFL players are really no different from the average American imbecile.

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