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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Heroic Man Rushes Into Movie Theater, Saves 4 Seats

KING OF PRUSSIA, PA—In what eyewitnesses are calling a "selfless display of true courage," moviegoer Michael N. Kincaid, 39, rushed headlong into an empty cineplex Monday to save four seats for the 7:35 p.m. showing of Live Free or Die Hard.

Shoving a group of teenaged girls and an elderly couple out of the way, the quick-thinking Kincaid scattered various personal items across the four seats, then commandeered a fifth for himself. "Mike sacrificed his own place in line at the snack counter to save these seats for me, Diane, Shelly from work, and Diane's boyfriend," said friend Colin Edward, who was in the men's room at the time. "We shall not soon forget his deeds this day."

Kincaid downplayed the episode, saying that he just did what anyone would have done if they had been the one chosen to save seats.

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