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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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High School Athlete On Crutches Walking Around Like Fallen Hero

HARRINGTON, DE—Proceeding slowly while limping down the hallway of Lake Forest High School on crutches, 16-year-old basketball player Jeremy Moore was reportedly walking around Friday like a fallen war hero. “I went up for a rebound and just felt a sharp pain,” said the junior shooting guard of the mild ankle sprain sustained in an away game, gripping his crutches tightly and bravely soldiering on as though he were the last surviving member of his battalion in the Korean War. “It’s been really tough coming back here like this, but I did what I had to do for my team. Those guys are like my family.” At press time, Moore was reportedly overcome with emotion when the basketball team dedicated their season to him.

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