Historical Archives: Ben Franklin Inventions This Week

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Historical Archives: Ben Franklin Inventions This Week

The Death-Kite.

The Carton Device For The Conveyance Of Eggs, To Minimize Breakage On Even The Moſt

Uneven Of Foot-Paths.

The U.S. Patent (Patented By Benjamin Franklin).

The Manual Vaginal Penetration Stick.

Power Windows.

The Inflatable Oblong Balloon, The Sort That Emits A Thunderous Clap, One Reſembling The Loud Exhale From One's Nether Regions.

Maidenhead Glue.


Being A Great And Pretentious Old Wind-Bag.