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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Historical Archives: Dances You May Wish To Try

T>he Toe-Point: The Lower Digits will be flexed to and froe in modest frequency, in keeping with the Tempo. A dramatic Dance suitable only for Weddings and the Winnings of Wars.

The Trot-Sit: Originating from SCANDALOUS GERMANY, this Dance requires two Partners to walk briskly from one side of the Room to the other, and then Sit Down.

The Newe Wedding Dance: A man of impressive Proportions takes An other man, whose Shape more resembles that of a Woman, in his powerful Arms and Twists her about in Time with the Music, of Preference a jaunting Traditional tapped with Fervor 'pon the Dulcimer, as he raises his Knees, first the right, then the left, then the right, then the left, to his Barrel-Chest, nearly dropping the Male Woman to the grounde, but then catching Her with his Hands, like those of A Bear, and grasping her by the El-bows with unusual Firmness, marches her against Protestation into the nearest Shelter where the Dance may continue for many Hours into the Night.

The JOLLY-TROT: by which Ladies and Gentle-Men, in successive Turns, walk briskly to the Center of a Square, where, surrounded by the Other, they Spin each one two times, then walk briskly back to place in Line, taking great care never to move their HIPS, lest Satan tempt the Revelers with Thoughts infernal.

The Apoplectic Fit: Lately revealed not to be a Dance, but a medical AFFLICTION of the greatest severity.

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New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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