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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Hometown Wistfully Toured Via Google Street View

COLUMBUS, OH—Eleven years after last walking through his hometown, 29-year-old local man Paul Brundage reportedly spent the entire evening Friday revisiting his childhood neighborhood in Decatur, IL using the Google Maps Street View feature. “Looks like that tree I always liked to climb is gone now,” said Brundage, sitting alone in his home office and slowly clicking through the panoramic images on his computer screen to retrace what was for six years the daily route he took between his childhood home and his elementary school. “I guess they got a new playground. And that market where I used to buy candy after school is a cell phone store now. Huh. I guess it has been a long time.” Sources confirmed Brundage later sat motionless for 40 minutes while staring at the house his high school girlfriend’s family moved out of eight years ago.

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