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The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

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DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.

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How To Consume Spicy Foods

Spicy foods continue to grow in popularity, whether they agree with your palate or not. Here are some tips on how to avoid social awkwardness while consuming spicy dishes:

  • Assure your palate you mean it no harm by giving it a little kiss before each meal.
  • Hot peppers can be dangerously potent, so err on the side of safety and wear goggles when eating them.
  • Put the sensation into perspective by making your professional life even hotter and spicier.
  • Discreetly wrap a napkin as best you can around your tongue.
  • When wearing a button-down shirt, it's important to leave it slightly open at the neck for a suave, casual effect, but not so open that others can see the top of the Van Halen logo on your T-shirt underneath.
  • Tilt your head upward so your companions can only see it in profile, open your mouth, and then pretend to drop the spicy food chunk by chunk down your throat, clandestinely hiding the morsels in a pouch wedged under your ear and between your neck and shirt collar.
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Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.

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