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Strongside/Weakside: Deshaun Watson

After leading his team to victory in the College Football Playoff National Championship, Clemson University quarterback Deshaun Watson announced he would forgo his final year of eligibility and declare for the NFL Draft. Is he any good?

NFL Implements New Court Date Attire Regulations

NEW YORK—Citing players’ responsibility to represent themselves and the league in a professional manner, the NFL announced a new set of regulations Monday governing the attire that players are allowed to wear during court dates.

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.
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Indianapolis Sports Reporter Pours His Little Heart Out In Peyton Manning Retirement Column

INDIANAPOLIS—Praising the veteran quarterback as “a man who changed the game of football forever,” Indianapolis Star reporter Kyle Bowman reportedly poured his little heart out Monday in a column about the retirement of Peyton Manning. “I have long dreaded the day when I would finally have to say this goodbye, but let me begin by saying that covering Peyton has been the greatest privilege of my professional life,” read an excerpt of Bowman’s glowing 3,800-word tribute, in which he gushed that Lucas Oil Stadium is “The House That Peyton Built.” “Peyton Manning has meant more to the fans and community here than anyone could ever put into words, and this city owes him a debt of gratitude for everything he accomplished during his 14 years in a Colts uniform. Number 18 will always be our quarterback.” Bowman then finished baring his undying love for Manning by concluding the piece with a single line reading “Thank you, Peyton.”


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