Internet Pop-Up Quiz Insulting

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Rescuers Heroically Help Beached Garbage Back Into Ocean

ATLANTIC BEACH, NC—In what many described as an inspiring display of selflessness and teamwork, a group of rescuers heroically saved a beached mound of garbage by helping the stranded trash back into the ocean, eyewitnesses reported Thursday.

Strongside/Weakside: Jurgen Klinsmann

Despite leading the U.S. men’s national team through the so-called “Group of Death” in the 2014 World Cup, Jurgen Klinsmann has come under heavy criticism this week after his side finished fourth in the 2015 Gold Cup. Is he any good?

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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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This Great Song, Bar Sources Report

TOMAH, WI—Pausing their conversations momentarily to call attention to the music playing on the establishment’s jukebox, sources at local bar Shepherd’s confirmed to reporters Friday that this is a great song.

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Internet Pop-Up Quiz Insulting

THOUSAND OAKS, CA—Internet user Paula Challey was insulted by the simplicity of a quiz that popped up on her computer desktop Monday. "I mean, come on—it offers me a prize if I can identify whether a picture is of Britney Spears, Madonna, or Paris Hilton," Challey said. "I'm a college graduate, for Christ's sake. Give me a real challenge! If these quizzes are this easy, I don't see the point in them." Challey then moved to the more formidable task of using her mouse to shoot an animated duck for the chance to win $100.