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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Is it time to establish a specialized Federal Emergency Pornography Agency?

The government response to the pornography outage that hit the Midwest this week has faced widespread criticism, with many complaining the emergency porn distributed by rescue workers was low-quality, featuring unattractive performers, poor camera angles, cheesy music, and only one facial. Is It time to establish a specialized Federal Emergency Pornography Agency?

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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

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