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Jerry Sandusky Pretty Charming In Interview

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Jerry Sandusky Pretty Charming In Interview

NEW YORK—In a recent interview aired on The Today Show, serial child molester Jerry Sandusky came across as a likable and really quite charming individual, sources told reporters Tuesday. “Boy, I gotta say, I found myself liking him a lot in that interview,” local man Scott Russell said of the former Penn State football coach and incarcerated rapist who last year was convicted of engaging in forced sodomy and oral sex with at least 10 underage boys. “He flashed that big ol’ smile, and talked in this warm, soft-spoken voice, and you could tell he’s got this really infectious, fun-loving personality. He was like a big kid! I don’t know, I just liked the way he carried himself.” Sources went on to confirm that “the guy’s just got a nice vibe about him.”

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