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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Jets Offensive Line Signs Up For Continuing Education Class On Pass Blocking

NEW YORK—Sources close to the Jets offensive line confirmed the players have enrolled in a continuing education course on pass blocking, attending their first class Monday at Hunter College to receive basic instruction on quarterback protection. “We are all learning a lot, and our teacher, Mr. Muñoz, is really nice and knows what he’s talking about, even if he’s kind of old,” said left guard Vlad Ducasse, adding that he learned just today that a lineman doesn’t have to wait for a defensive player to touch him before attempting to block. “I never thought about pad level before, but it seems pretty important. We also worked on doing this pass-blocking stance where we bend our knees and keep our backs straight and lift up our arms. It’s hard because it feels more natural and less tiring to just let your arms hang at your side.” Although a few Jets offensive linemen said they were learning valuable skills and techniques that could help improve their careers, the majority agreed that pass blocking wasn’t for them.

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